Phil for Humanity Phil for Humanity
A Guide for the Survival of Humankind and Helping the World, Society, and Yourself.

Useless Christmas Gifts

To those of you who gave us useless Christmas gifts,

It is not that we did not appreciate the Christmas gifts that you gave us, but your gifts will forever remain unused or worse… become re-gifted. Here are some examples:
  • Christmas Ornaments and Decorations: Let’s just say that our taste in decorations differs from yours… by a lot.
  • Candies and Cookies: We receive enough candies and cookies for Christmas to last us over 3 months assuming heavy consumption. Trust us, we don’t need more empty calories.

  • Clothes and Jewelries: We also have every different styles. So unless it is the type of clothes and jewelries that you know that we typically wear, don’t buy it.
  • Colognes and Perfumes: You either don’t have a good sense of smell or you think we smell worse. Either way, we are not going to wear it unless you know it is a brand that we buy for ourselves.
  • Calendars: We know we are a week away from a new year and no matter how funny the jokes are or how beautiful the pictures are, there is a good reason why calendars are no longer as popular as they once were. It is because computers are much better calendars, and there is no going back.
  • Kitchen Appliances: We lived our whole life without a hard boiled egg cutter or whatever thingy is on sale this year. If we ever needed one, we would have already bought one.
  • Gift Cards: If you want to give us money, please just give cash. Gift cards have no advantages over cash… only disadvantages. Read more about this here.
We know it is the thought that counts; but next time, please think more carefully. Here are 3 suggestions for next time.
  1. Ask: Ask us what we want. Maybe we know we need more shirts, shoes, socks, thingamajigs, or whatchamacallits.
  2. Take Us Shopping: Let’s face reality. We are no longer kids who enjoy surprises. Instead, take us shopping and let us pick out something for ourselves.
  3. Gift Receipts: If you are not sure if we will like your gift, always include a gift receipt.
Please take our advice. Otherwise your gifts will be thrown away, part of next year’s yard sale, or it may even come back to you as a re-gift.

Thank you for reading this rant,

From everyone who received a useless gift

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